My Left Ankle

     After more than a year's delay I took myself to see a Certified Movement Analyst.  July 2011, in my attempt to improve my physical well being, I started jump roping.  Fifteen seconds into it, I felt a snap in my left ankle.  While not broken, it hasn't been right since.  Well of course not, it's my left ankle, but you know what I mean.  Now my body is out of alignment.  In particular my knee is sore because my foot turns inward so much more.  How symbolic is that!  I turn inward spiritually a lot as well. 

     Enter Mavis Lockwood.  All she did was observe how I move, ask a bunch of questions, apply her prodigious understanding of anatomy to the situation, and give me a few exercises to do.  
     "Do you always get up from a chair like that?"
     "Like what?"
     "You lean to the right."
     "I do?!?!"
     I had no idea that I was listing to the right when I stand and walk.  I had no idea that I was bending with my back and not my legs.  I had no idea my head leans forward when I stand or sit.  Of course not.  We never notice what feels natural to us.  She also pointed out that we can exercise with the very best intentions, but without an expert to observe us we could be doing it wrong.   Suffice it to say, all Mavis did was to help me tremendously.
     This gets me thinking about how much we may be fortifying our practices of all kinds because we think we are doing them right...or are right!  I can spend a lot of time going inward and mucking around in my stuff, thinking I am getting to know myself and healing myself.  But what if I'm just getting stuck in a different way?  I have a wonderful new man in my life.  After six weeks together we've become more open with each other.  I shared some of my relationship history with him one night, and in his very warm and understanding voice he said, "That explains a lot."  Puzzled I asked him to say more.  "Well you come across as so confident that I began to think that I wouldn't be able to keep up with you."  So here I am practicing confidence, self-reliance, everything I think I need to do to take care of myself; and now I understand where I might come across as intimidating. 
     Would you consider asking people to share their observations of you?  Enlist a colleague, a trusted friend, someone with whom you share an interest.  Ask about your body language, how you hit a tennis ball, what your phone manner is like.  Make it a neutral behavior.  Just get observations.  Ask more questions about it for clarification.  Talk about what you'd like to alter and how, if you feel it necessary at all.  But whether you make a change or not, it is amazing to see yourself through another's eyes.

Pax tecum.